SSSHHhhhhh, it's a secret!

Preface:
I've always, always, always wanted to play the violin. ALWAYS. Maybe with the combination of living overseas and not being assertive enough I didn't have that opportunity to learn in my youth.

I was sickly green with envy when my younger sister started learning how to play. She is wonderful and so dang lovable that I couldn't be jealous for long. How great for her that she had that opportunity!

May 25, 2007:
The dream to play hasn't ever gone away and in fact it gets stronger as I get older. So for my 27th birthday I decided to (finally!) bite the bullet. I bought myself a violin and a book and started bowing. I did okay to practice once or twice a week that summer but then a variety of conflicts hit me. Being called as the Young Women's president in our ward, fall semester of The Studio started, and a small detail of being pregnant with my fourth baby!!! The violin went to the back of the closet.

Present Day:
My life as slowed down and I have about 6 free hours a day that I needed to fill with SOMETHING! LOL!!! If you aren't laughing out loud, DO IT NOW! Okay so that really isn't the reason why I got the violin out again. It boils down to a few very basic and important-to-me reasons:

~ IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY DREAM!
~ New Years Resolution (I'm serious this year!)
~ I want my kids to see me start something that I'm not good at, work hard at it and eventually master it. I want them to SEE that I'm willing to try something new, to go after your dreams and to SUCCEED!
~ I'd like to overcome this never-ending feeling of being average. I want to be AWESOME at something (okay lots of things but for now I'm working on the violin.)

So if it's a secret as the title suggests, me trying to teach myself how to play the violin, than I'm sure you're asking yourself, "Why is she blogging about it?"

Answer:
My sweet and generous kindergartener was learning about violins in school. He rose his hand so proudly and said, "My mom can play the violin." Blessed his heart because what I'm a currently doing does not constitute as playing in the musical world! Mrs. Wagner called me up and wondered if I'd like to come and display my talent. I explained that my son is very loving and kind and while I do have a violin I'm not sure that my screeching across the strings would be music to their ears. She loved the idea of showing the kids that grow-ups have to try and work at things too (isn't that the truth!) So very humbly I showed up to Austin's class on my regular volunteer day with my violin. I explained the depth of my knowledge on how to play - it was very appropriate for their age :) and then humbly played "Mary Had a Little Lamb." My hands were shaking as I bowed the strings, it was a little rough and D was quite out of tune. At least I did model an adult not being successful and needing to try hard! Did I mention it was a humbling experience?

So in all seriousness I need to thank my pretty amazing son. One for loving me completely and without hesitation or reserve. He has heard my practicing and he still told his class I could play. And most of all he was proud that I came and he thought I did a great job. Second for the motivation he gives me to practice and to master this instrument but more importantly to accomplish a dream. For Austin, and Emma Lynn, and Spencer and Ruth I need to do this. I need to do it for myself. I'm not average, I can become great.

So like all goals it works better if you are held accountable. It started with all of Mrs. Wagner's kindergartners knowing plus all my Young Women...so I might as well be really committed and tell you. The secret is out, I'm learning to play the violin! I promised Mrs. Wagner's kindergarten class that I would come back at the end of the year and play another song for them. And it's gonna be BETTER!

So you'll excuse me now, I have to go practice!